Disinterested Spouse: Marriage issues and the solutions

How to Deal with a Disinterested Spouse

Marriage is a tough job. Learning to live with another person, even one that you love takes
time to get used to. If your marriage has hit a dry spell lately, don’t get frustrated and upset. Here are a few ways to get to the bottom of the issue of
a disinterested spouse.

You come home after a long day at work or maybe you are a stay-at-home mother. When your spouse comes home, you give him a big kiss and ask about his day. He mumbles a
quick response and heads off to the computer room, where he stays for the next
hour or so. Or, maybe he comes home and announces that he and the guys are
going to a ballgame and he won’t be staying for dinner.

If you have experienced something similar, you may be scratching your head trying to figure out what is going on. The first thing I want to say is not to jump to conclusions. Everyone needs their space now and then.

Communicate with your spouse. If you have a problem with their behavior, let them know. Chances are your spouse is not aware that there is a problem going on. Sit down with him and tell him how you feel about his apparent disinterest.

Men are not the type of people to open up readily about their problems. Women, on the other
hand, like to talk about an issue until we’ve picked the bones clean. When he is out with his friends, he can casually mention a situation that he is having.
The guys may comment briefly but then it’s over and done with.

Couples naturally grow apart when they have a family. Once the children come along,
there is less time for intimacy and more time for arguing about the kids. A lot of energy goes into raising kids and keeping a home. Most of us just look for any chance to unwind.

You might not like what your spouse has to say, but listen anyway. This is the only way
to find a solution. Suggest a date night with your spouse. Get to know the other person all over again. Send the kids to a friend or relative’s house for
the entire evening. Rekindle the intimacy that has been missing for so long.

Let your spouse know that you are there to listen if they have a problem they want to
discuss and you won’t offer advice if they don’t want or need it. Somewhere
along the way things have gotten off track, but they can be fixed if you both want it. Communicating with each other is the only way to get both of your needs met.

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Hi, My name is Peter.

I have been married for over 20 years. Throughout those twenty short years, my wife and I have experienced many good and bad moments.

Ten years ago, our marriage was in deep trouble, due to lots of stress and misunderstanding. We were in the edge of getting a divorce. But we promised each other that we would get worked out our problems together.

We started to find help with marriage counselor and sweeping the Internet for any tips to solve our problems and started to enjoy our marriage again.

Today, we can tell you that our hard works have paid off.

Our sessions with counselor had good results, but most importantly, we have found many guidance and tips in the Internet from people who have experienced similar problems and survived. Furthermore, we have downloaded a few books and received many excellent advice on how to keep our marriage alive and fresh.

For tips and guides on marriages, click here.

True. We have spent some money on the counseling session and a little bit on buying books. But I will say that those are just a little investment that have paid huge dividends.

I would like to share with you my experience and tips on how to get through tough marriage in my subsequent post.

Cheers
Peter